I'm an Alien.

I told myself that this wouldn’t be a rant-y blog but it’s been five days in Tokyo and I seriously cannot help but express myself before I forget how to.

Bear with me.

I don’t have a good reason as to why you should, but me telling you to should be reason enough.

I couldn’t care less if you’re the hugest social butterfly in the universe, but when you meet someone for the first time, it’s usually awkward.

It’s awkward not because you don’t talk a lot to one another, but purely because you have no idea of the intentions that the person has towards you.

Friendships, hook-ups, one night stands, potential girlfriend, marriage… The list just goes on, and on really.

Ha. Do you like it how I put meaningless sex in front of romance?

Needless to say, sometimes it isn’t awkward, and you had this intense Disney Lion King connection with the person you’re talking to.

Sometimes you just click, and you can instantly connect on the most pointless topic that may arise in the conversation.

For most normal 13-15 year old teenage girls nowadays, it’s Twilight and Justin freaking Bieber.

For most Japanese teenage girls nowadays, it is really their need to involve themselves with a white guy even though he is absolutely downright disgusting, listens to the mainstream Pop, and doesn’t really have an opinion about anything but himself. 

He is the only “kakkoui” thing to ever grace our planet and save us from the overwhelming population of the single Japanese men. Really.

Kakkoui means “cool”, by the way, in case you didn’t get that. 

My laptop is currently rejecting the Japanese wireless internet system with gusto, and therefore I have to obviously use the cord downstairs to get internet. It somehow doesn’t prevent calls from coming into the house, which I don’t really understand, but it works downstairs and not upstairs.

God just doesn’t want me to be in my room and on YouTube or Facebook.

By alienating myself from English, I seriously will have to learn Japanese and have somewhat of a connection to someone or I’ll die.

To be honest, I’m starting to find it challenging to express myself in English. Japanese grammar structure has eff’ed me over, and I am using the weirdest and most unnecessary ways to express myself.

I know why they call it an “alien registration” now, because damn, when you’re in Japan, you will feel like you belong to no damn country in this world.

My homestay family genuinely didn’t sign up for this program for a live in babysitter, dogsitter or an English tutor.

*cue shocked faces*

They want me simply because they “fell in love” with my letter to them in my application form.

That, truly is a blessing from above.

And I’m saying this from meeting them for only tonight.

They truly want me to be part of the family. I know for a fact that I most likely can’t contribute financially or give them anything remotely important back, but they are giving me so much more than I expected.

The photos I attached to my blog are simply a sneak peek of the ones I have vomited onto Facebook in the latest photo album(s).

Need I say more? The room is a freaking shrine to my nickname at school - apple.

Not only that, get at this. My homestay mom MADE all the decorations in the room!

She’s some sort of great creative insanely talented woman that can do lots of things with her hands.

(do NOT give me dick jokes, I will slap you)

She’s so good at hand crafts and just making anything out of everything.

It’s amazing, and she gave me a great first impression. 

She wants to have unicef babies and go around the world to help people in poverty.

What kind of Japanese wife would have such an amazing dream?

It’s inspiring.

The dad comes home at 7, and is very much in love with his wife.

It’s sickening sometimes, because their house kinda doesn’t have much barrier between the kitchen, dining room, and living room, so you can hear, and see everything.

The baby makes me take showers with her. She clings to me. Literally clings. She likes to hug my waist, my legs, my arms, my everything really.

She’s totally adorable though, and she thinks I’m amazing because I can make jokes in Japanese and sing the Doraemon theme song.

Ah, I love Japanese kids.

 

Do I have problems with the Japanese culture?

Of course I do.

Can I adjust?

I’m trying.

I’m seriously trying, and giving it a go. Being positive is a huge challenge for me, so I am trying so hard to be positive towards public transportation and the intense staring when I’m in public.

My homestay mom felt the need to tell me each and every time that someone was talking about me in the mall we went to today.

Apparently, according to the lady who sold me some socks, I look like a Japanese but don’t act like one or have a Japanese accent.

Although, she did say that my Japanese was surprisingly great for a foreigner.

CAN I HEAR A WOOT WOOT?!

Haha.. Man, I should calm down.

 Obviously a lack of blogging has caused me to verbally vomit all my emotion on the internet.

Sorry, internet. I love you so much you have no idea.

I’m an alien in this country.

I find it hard to connect with some of the Japanese girls because ohmygosh, do you SERIOUSLY have no opinion about anything?

The maturity they have is literally non existent, and they think on the most naive level one can possibly handle.

As I pointed out earlier, most of them worship the feet of white men, and yeah, to be frank with you, I don’t worship anyone’s feet.

So far, I’ve only had decent conversations with the students that have lived in America for a couple of years.

They seem to hate the Japanese culture after they’ve lived in America.

I hope I appreciate mine more as opposed to hating it more.

I hope, and I’ll continue to hope.

I’m an alien because I don’t know what is going on in the media.

Is someone dying? Has someone died?

Is America going up in flames?

You know what’s even more disgusting? Alice in Wonderland isn’t even out in Japan yet.

We complain in New Zealand that movies come to our country slow?

Stop all your whiny complaints! You have no idea how late some of the movies here are being shown in theatres.

Hannah Montana the Movie hasn’t even graced Disney Channel Japan.

Disney Channel Japan is so out of date to the extent that it still broadcasts Lizzie McGuire.

…yes, I am comparing the media in Japan by my constant exposure to Disney Channel.

I’m an alien because I know that I’ll make strong friendships here, but they will be left alone once I go back to New Zealand.

Then again, what’s going to happen to my friendships in New Zealand?

I feel like I’m going to be forgotten.

I hate this feeling, and I just want to belong.

Aliens.

No wonder so many movies are made about them.

They’re all pretty much depressed creatures with no sense of belonging to anything. 

This is my homesickness talking, so ignore me.

I’m truly happy with what I have right now,

And I’m taking all the goodness in.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m so grateful for this opportunity.

It’s just.. when you have too much of a great thing, you miss what you used to know.

All my love always,

April