so far, so good.

I've noticed that a lot of Japanese people lack opinions and personalities.

You get the odd ones, the ones that give a crap.
The ones that have been exposed to different cultures, and have realized what their own is missing.
Those Japanese people have tact.
The average Japanese person though;
they do not possess an opinion about anything whatsoever.

If a traumatic bomb came and hit Tokyo,
the majority of the teens here would most likely chuck in a いやだ (iyada) to express their dislike for the incident.
That's most likely it.
They would continue on with their lives, and act like nothing is wrong.

The Japanese language continues to annoy me everyday,
especially the fact that they do not know how to be compassionate, but they use phrase(s) just for the sake of social obligation. 
It's so fake, and it sickens me to the core.
Words such as がんばって、ざんねんですね、しようがない、are just the few I cannot stand.
These are my top three though.
These all have one thing in common; they suck.

You see, がんばって is a word used to try and say "hey, good luck, keep going, don't fail at life", whatever.
But the Japanese feel take it a little too far.
Sure, you can use がんばって when its a sport match, or perhaps with a test,
but don't use がんばって when you are dealing with a serious situation.
Japanese people use がんばって when they don't know what to say, and they feel the need to say something, but in reality, they don't give a rats ass about what you are going through.
がんばって is like advice. Well, thank you for attempting to encourage me but you just really frustrated me even more.
 
ざんねんですね is quite amusing.
ざんねんですね is used so often in the Japanese language, that it actually is really ざんねんですね. 
It means "that's too bad", but Japanese people use it in the most ridiculous and wrong situations that I just find it so funny.
It's literally like "hey dude, my cat died today", or "man, my parents are getting divorced," and then the Japanese people will literally smile, and say ざんねんですね, and then follow up with a "so how is your day buddy?"

しようがない is.. I don't even know what it is.
This phrase is like ざんねんで すね except with more fake compassion, and minus the amusement.
Whenever someone pulls a しようがない on me, I shoot them the most dirty and sinful look I feel my soul vomit a bit inside.

Despite my frustration with the Japanese people and their lack of compassion for anything,
I've realized that my life in Tokyo is getting better.
I'm starting to realize that if I don't take the little things to heart, and I just get over myself for once,
Tokyo is one of the coolest places to explore.
Sure, I have a curfew,
but I have the whole year to truly enjoy Tokyo.
Sure, I regularly get compared to previous foreigners whom have superhuman abilities and learn the whole Japanese language in the course of two weeks,
but I'll survive.

I've realized that if I just let go, and let God, life won't be so tough.
I have no one to really oblige but God.
I've taken Him for granted, and I've forgotten that He's really been looking out for me in ways I cannot possibly imagine.
He's been testing me through situations, watching me, if I'll usually do my little angry rant at Him for not giving me what I want, then apologizing for it later when I realized I've yet to discover the outcome of the situation.

He's blessed me with so much more than I can possibly ask for.
Opportunities, friends, a great church, and great support back home.
I've counted my blessing, and I've realized that I cannot complain.
I've just got to accept the differences and move on.
I can maybe rant for a week or so,
but at the end of the day, I have more positives than negatives going for me right now.

I went to my first baseball game!

It was so much fun, and I've discovered that baseball is such a tease because at the end of the day,
nothing really exciting happens, its just hit, strike, "oh, ざんねんで すね, lets try two more times, and fail yet again."
The best part about the game was just the fans.
Oh, the lovely fans.
The baseball team players each have their own song dedicated to them.
What's even cooler, is that these Japanese crazed fans remember all the words, and the different tunes to each one, and they even know when to sing the songs!
It's mind blowing, and I don't understand how they can be so passionate for sport, but not for people.

I've also made some really cool friends here in Tokyo,
and although they are from foreign countries,
they are awesome.
I've realized how much we take for granted back in New Zealand.
Freedom of expression, freedom to breathe the air without choking terribly at the taste of nicotine in the back of your throat?
These are all privileges we didn't know we had,
and when you come to Japan, you appreciate your home country more.
When native people from Japan leave their home country to a different one,
they begin to experience a weird form of culture shock.

I've also been to many parts of Tokyo to shop and eat, and just act like a total gaijin while I have the license to.
Sunshine City in Ikebukuro had no sunshine, but the shopping was good fun!

So apart from the lack of good western food in Japan,
and apart from the pasta that gave me one of the worst tummy aches to date,
I am enjoying Tokyo.

I feel proud that I am so immune to the cute now.
I can proudly say I am walking by stores that I would have previously tried to buy two years ago when I was here.
I have a strong immune system to the "cute", but not such a strong immune system when it comes to shopping at foreign brands.
It'll get better though. Right?
Yes, right. :]

So.
To all the endless artificial and yet somehow oddly pleasant looking photo booth taking sessions yet to come,
and all the places in Tokyo yet to explore,

I bid you お休み (goodnight)  from Japan.

All my love always,

April